The Wrong Road to the Right Place
by grayskies317
Summary: AU - Shelagh was an incredible nurse/midwife but was in a terrible loveless marriage. Can she find her way to happiness - whatever/whomever that may be?
1. Chapter 1

**Preface**

Shelagh Mannion had always been incredibly ambitious – finishing her nursing and midwifery training in record time and becoming one of the greatest district nurses and midwives to ever come to Nonnatus house. Within her first year at Nonnatus, her dedication, ambition, and incomparable knowledge of her profession had caught the eye of a very attractive docks manager. He oozed with charm and persuasion techniques that he generously poured over the young and sweet Nurse Mannion. By the summer of 1949, twenty-three-year-old Shelagh Mannion was married and became Mrs. John Greene. While at first Shelagh believed to have found her 'happily ever after', things changed quickly. Thankfully, she still had her career.

 **Chapter 1**

Throughout the years at Nonnatus, Shelagh had become very close with the sisters. She frequently joined them for compline and morning prayer. John never understood why she would waste her time with such things as he was a man of no faith and often chastised Shelagh for her beliefs. However, that was the least of her issues with her husband. When they first met, he had been a real charmer – doing and saying all the right things to sweep Shelagh off her feet – but over time, his true colours began to show and Shelagh realised just what kind of man John Greene was. He was a very possessive and jealous man who would take his many frustrations out on his tiny wife when he'd come home late from the pub. More times than not, John would come home in a drunken state and wake Shelagh just so he could verbally – and many times physically – assault her to ease his mind of the frustrations he encountered that day or felt that she was somehow responsible for. Having no family to turn to, Shelagh felt she was trapped and this was her life sentence, therefore, she poured all of her energies into her work and her faith. She knew that something would give, eventually.

It was a beautifully sunny spring morning in Poplar, and as many mornings in the past, Shelagh had arrived at Nonnatus before sunrise to join the nuns for compline. Over the past several years, Shelagh often thought to herself that maybe she should have considered a religious life rather than the one she was currently living, but she stayed strong in her faith and believed that God would lead her exactly where she needed to be in life. She had often confided in Sister Julienne about her marital struggles, but Sister Julienne knew that Shelagh took her vows far too seriously to ever walk away from her marriage, no matter the abuse she was taking from it. So, she knew it best to just be as supportive as she could be to her colleague and pray for her each day. On this particular morning, Sister Julienne was quite surprised to see that Shelagh had arrived late to compline, not that she was required to be there at all, but it was very uncharacteristic of her to be anything but early. She knew something was off and planned to discreetly discuss it with Shelagh afterwards. Once compline was complete, she went straight to Shelagh and immediately noticed the most likely reason for this morning's tardy; Shelagh's left cheekbone had a very fresh bruise on it and her eyes were evident with the remnants of recent tears. Without saying a word, Sister Julienne simply ushered Shelagh into her office to avoid any attention of the others.

Once they were behind the closed door, the conversation began.

"My dear Shelagh, please tell me this was some kind of accident," Sister Julienne knew better, but a small piece of her begged God to let there be some other – rational – explanation to this wound.

"I wish I could, Sister, but it is exactly what you think. He usually doesn't go for my face, but this morning, even after sleeping a few hours, he awoke still drunk. He was rambling on about how the barmaid wouldn't serve him anymore and sent him home because he'd had too much already. As usual, the fault lies with me," Shelagh shook her head at the absurdity of it all. She was ashamed of herself for taking so much, but she had now done it for so long she wasn't sure how to make it right or if she had the gall to walk away.

At this point, all Sister Julienne could do was give Shelagh a hug and reassure her that things will improve and to keep her faith. After putting a cool rag on Shelagh's cheek, Sister Julienne then went for their reinforcement - as they called Trixie. While it was rare that John would take his rage out on Shelagh's face, this wasn't the first time, and the few Nonnatuns that knew of her home life knew what to do to help cover it up and keep her strong face on for the day ahead.

"Oh sweetie, this won't do at all. Let's get you fixed up," Trixie said as she walked in, makeup bag and tools in hand. Shelagh typically didn't wear makeup, so Trixie was careful not to make it too obvious that she was wearing any, but instead made it look as though Shelagh had just added a wee more effort into her routine that morning.

While Sister Julienne was there to be supportive of Shelagh and kept her thoughts of the situation mostly to herself, Trixie was much less reserved in her thoughts on the piece of dirt that Shelagh called her husband.

"I know he is your husband and you vowed to be by his side, but sweetie, no one would hold it against you to just walk away. You deserve so much better than this; I just wish you'd see it. I bet your 'Mr. Right' is out there right now wondering around all alone because his soulmate is locked into some loveless marriage with a crazy woman-beater," Trixie ranted as she carefully and expertly applied the pan stick to Shelagh's quickly bruising face. Shelagh knew that Trixie was right and just sat silently as she listened to Trixie's rant.

"Shelagh, you know I love you, sweetie. Please know I only say all of this out of concern for your happiness and well-being," Trixie said as sweetly as she could.

"I know, Trixie, and you're right about it all. I just don't know where to go from here. I've been doing this for so long now that I don't know how to move away from it," Shelagh confessed aloud for the first time. Both Trixie and Sister Julienne stood in a silent shock as neither of them could believe that they had just heard this confession from Shelagh. She usually just defended her decision to stay with her marriage vows and the conversation was closed for further comment, but this was new. They both wondered if maybe this was the last straw and Shelagh might actually be ready to walk away from it all now. Neither of them said another word, completed the task at hand, and moved on with their day.

It turned out to be a particularly busy day between all of the district and midwifery patients and the weekly clinic. As usual, Shelagh volunteered to stay behind to clean and tidy everything after clinic. To the unknowing, she was just a very generous person, to those who knew her dark secrets knew that it was one of her many ploys to keep from going home for the evening. Shelagh hadn't realised that Doctor Turner had stayed behind that afternoon as well; for some reason, he had decided to review some of the patient notes and clinic information at the Parish Hall rather than in his office back at the surgery. He had caught her off-guard when he walked into the kitchen where she was washing and organising medical equipment.

"Oh, good evening, Nurse Greene. I didn't realise anyone else was still here. How are you?" He asked. He was always so polite to her, completely the opposite of her nightmare of a husband. She had thought many times over the years of seeing him with patients that the world could certainly use a few more kind and gentle Dr. Turners and a few less John Greenes. She also remembered thinking that she couldn't fathom why God would allow such genuinely selfless man to suffer so badly when Dr. Turner's wife had passed suddenly. Now it was just him and his sweet little boy. Shelagh always wanted to have children, but she was so grateful that she had not had any with John. It would have made life so much harder and it would have been entirely unfair to the child. She couldn't imagine her husband being anything more than a truly dreadful and abusive father, and she never wanted that for her theoretical children. She felt that her lack of children was God's way of having mercy on her despite her poor choices in the area of a husband and marriage.

Dr. Turner's voice brought her back from her thoughts, "Nurse, are you okay?" he asked, seeming a bit concerned at her lack of response.

"Oh, yes, Doctor. Just a bit lost in thought, I suppose. How are you? Long day?" she responded sweetly as usual.

"Very. I still have quite a few notes to go over though. Do you mind if I sit here to go over them?"

"Of course. I'll be out of the way very soon." Shelagh went back to her cleaning and mindlessly used the back of her wrist to wipe her face while she cleaned. Her exhaustion had made her forget about the makeup that she would be wiping away with this action and she immediately remembered when she felt the sting run through her cheek as she made even the gentlest of contact. Much to her dismay, Doctor Turner had seen the whole thing and immediately noticed the wince and the tiniest bit of bruise that was now showing from under the smeared pan stick that Trixie had applied many hours earlier.

Doctor Turner arose with a bit of alarm, "Nurse Greene, what's happened to your face? Would you please allow me to take a look?"

Shelagh quickly turned away, immensely ashamed, "It is nothing, Doctor. Thank you for your concern."

Doctor Turner couldn't take that as an acceptable answer. He knew she would have a much more subdued response to the whole situation if it were actually nothing. He'd seen the marks of abuse far too many times for him to have any question as to how it got there. Shelagh was the kindest woman he'd ever had the pleasure of working with and was the last person that would deserve someone to harm her in this way. He'd always admired her dedication and persistence in her work, and wished he could be even half as caring as she always was. The sight of this bruise – that she had obviously tried to hide – made him angry to his core. He walked around and gently grabbed her chin to lift her face to him to examine the mark. Shelagh kept her eyes closed as a sign of – what he could only assume was – shame or embarrassment as many battered women did. He used the utmost caution when removing her glasses and then clearing the area of the makeup to get a better look at the affected area. This kind of situation was always difficult for him as he never understood a man who had any urge to put his hand to a woman, but for some reason, this cut him straight to the core. Shelagh – or Nurse Greene as he knew her – was not only a very valued colleague, but someone he had grown to care for. She was always there when he needed a hand, even when it wasn't work related. Countless times she had been there when his son, Timothy had needed a quick bandaging from playing too rough outside, or when Doctor Turner had spilled his tea all over his coat. She was the last person that deserved this.

He continued to most gently care for her wounded face then, once he finally got her to open her eyes which were now showing sign of threatening tears, he asked her to sit down. "Nurse Greene, I can make a pretty good assumption as to what happened, but I'd really like for you to tell me how you ended up with this mark on your face," he tried to be as compassionate as he could be while still being firm enough to get her to respond truthfully.

Shelagh took a deep breath and told Doctor Turner the full story, not just of that morning, but of the whole marriage. Even though she had confided in Sister Julienne and Trixie for many years, this was different and somehow felt like a large weight had been lifted off her shoulders. She also explained that she was unsure of what direction to take from here, but she knew that it couldn't go on like this and she needed to make a change somehow. Through her entire confession, he gave her his utmost attention and the occasional comforting hand on her shoulder when the story got a bit harder to tell. This made her know with even greater certainty that she needed to get away from John as soon as she possibly could because she wanted nothing more than to be with a man that could care for her, her thoughts, and her situations like the man right in front of her did.

"Nurse Greene –"

"Shelagh, please," Shelagh interrupted him. She felt after such a deep confession, he at least deserved to call her by her first name.

"Certainly. Shelagh, I want you to know that I am here for whatever you may need. Please don't hesitate to ask. I do hope you find your path to a happier situation; you deserve it more than anyone I know," and with those last few words, Doctor Turner carefully took her hand and caressed it ever so slightly, "and please, call me Patrick."


	2. Chapter 2

As the days turned to weeks, Shelagh had been tirelessly researching her options to remove herself from her marital situation with the least amount of turmoil, but ultimately thought it best to consult legal counsel. She knew that her consultation would be confidential and therefore gave her whole story of abuse and her desire to simply start anew. After she gave all of the information, her legal counsel, Mr. Carlisle, gave her little insight of what was to come, but assured her that he would take the information and conduct the proper research so that she can get the result she hoped for.

A few days went by and Shelagh had not heard from Mr. Carlisle, but assumed that, like her, he was quite busy and working diligently. On this particular day, it was quite a late evening when she arrived home after work. She was completely caught by surprise to find that her husband had beat her home.

"Did ya really think Mr. Carlisle would not come to me first? Did ya really think you could go behind my back and try to leave me?" Fear set in immediately as she could hear and smell that he was more inebriated than she had ever seen him, and now, he had all the ammunition he needed to really make her miserable. She immediately chastised herself for seeking counsel rather than continuing her research on her own. Before she could respond, John spoke up again, practically shouting at this point, "Listen here you little bitch, I've done a whole lot for you. I put up with you and your antics and your need to be runnin' all over Poplar instead of in my kitchen where you belong. And this is how you repay me? I don't know if you've been out whorin' around or if you're just an ungrateful bitch, but either way, I'll make sure you learn your place again," and with that his fist flew through the air and landed right on the side of her face with such force that she fell straight to the floor. Shelagh knew she was no match for John as he was a very large man who – thanks to many years working at the docks – was quite strong, so she did her best to just avoid each blow that followed. Unfortunately, most of her attempts were in vain. Between her cries and begging him to stop, she said silent prayers pleading that John would just pass out from the alcohol or would tire of this. She was terrified that this would be her last day here on Earth. By now, she was curled up – tear soaked and blood stained – as tightly as she could in the corner trying her hardest to protect herself from each lash of anger that came her way, until finally he stopped and stood straight up. She didn't dare lift her head though.

"I'm tired now, I'm going off to bed. You best stay right where you are, I expect breakfast in the morning when I wake. Don't even think about going anywhere before then, I've worked the locks so you can't leave without my key anyway. And you better make sure you clean up that blood off the rug, I ain't buying you a new one," and with his slurred tirade over, he was off to bed.

Once she was certain that she was completely alone, she began to mentally inventory her injuries. She knew she needed medical attention, but she also knew that she had no way of getting it without leaving the flat, so she would have to make do with the minimal supplies she had at home. She started with putting a cool cloth on her face to help with the swelling. Shelagh knew she'd have at least one eye nearly swollen shut, and if she could avoid having both swollen shut, it would certainly be helpful in keeping out of his way. With every move that she made, Shelagh winced in pain as she had injuries from head to toe and could feel each one as if each one was at the forefront of her mind at once. However, she knew she only had a couple of hours before John awoke and the best thing she could do while he was still here and she was trapped was to clean the rug and make his breakfast as he had requested. She could begin working toward getting medical help and getting out of there once he was gone for work.

John awoke right on time for work and was down the stairs in no time. She could smell that the alcohol, unfortunately, had not been completely slept away, and hoped that breakfast and her silence would be enough to keep him at bay until he needed to leave. Despite not showing any immediate signs of planning to physically assault her, John had no trouble dishing out the verbal ones.

"If you'd spend half as much time in this damn kitchen - where you belong – as you do flauntin' yourself all over Poplar, you might be able to prepare a breakfast that tastes halfway decent. You best be glad that I need to get to work and don't have time to wait or I'd make you throw this rubbish away and make it again." With that, he took his last bite and threw the plate straight at Shelagh who was standing near the sink. Thankfully, she was quick thinking enough to dodge it and allow it to shatter on the wall. She could tell this angered him and silently begged God to just guide him out of the door as she simply couldn't handle another blow.

With heavy breathing and gritted teeth, he spat, "You best have that cleaned up when I get home. This house is a mess!" And with that, he stormed out of the door and she heard him lock the door with his key. She gave herself a moment to catch her breath and say a quick prayer of thanks for allowing her to make it through the morning without any further injury before going to the door to inspect the new locking system John had installed. He was, in fact, correct; she wasn't getting out of this flat without a key. She was trapped as they had no phone inside their home, therefore, it was time to devise a plan to get help. Just then, she remembered that all of the school boys ran past her flat each morning on their way to school, if she could flag one down through the mail slot, maybe they could deliver a note for her. She checked the clock and realised she had about fifteen minutes. She wrote down a quick bit of information and her address then waited, watching out of the mail slot. Just then, a few minutes ahead of the school rush, she saw Timothy Turner walking alone. She called out, "Timothy! Timothy!"

With that, he began to look around, a bit confused as he could see no one around, but he recognised her voice immediately, "Nurse Greene? Where are you?" The young lad continued scanning the empty street around him.

"Over here, Tim. Number 15. Come quickly!" Shelagh shouted through the mail slot

Timothy ran over and realised she was calling through the mail slot so he squatted down a bit confused. "Nurse Greene, is that you?"

"Yes, Tim. I'm sorry to have startled you, but I seem to have locked myself in with this new lock system. Silly me, could you please take this note straight to your father? I really need his help."

Timothy agreed and with that she slid the note through the slot and he could see a bit of dried blood on her hand. "Nurse Greene, are you injured?" He had the utmost concern in his voice and Shelagh felt so bad for worrying him in this way.

"Oh dear, it is nothing, but if you could get this to your father, it would be such a great help," She said trying desperately to avoid having to answer too many questions.

"Yes, certainly. I hope you're okay and Dad is able to help," The sweet boy said as he stood again and ran back the other way just as the rush of other school boys was coming through.

Shelagh was so grateful that Timothy had been alone and was the one to stop for her. She knew that she could trust the Turners, even though she wasn't quite sure who else to trust after this most recent situation. After Timothy had scurried off, Shelagh sat quietly and prayed as she watched the clock. It seemed like she'd been waiting for days, but it had only been about a half hour when she heard his voice on the opposite side of the door.

"Shelagh, are you there?" Patrick asked gently as he carefully knocked on the door. She rose quickly and called back, "Yes, I'm here. Please help me." She was so close to completely coming apart at this point.

"Shelagh, I'm here with Constable Noakes. I read your note, but you can trust him. He's here with me to help me get you out of here. Please back away from the door," His voice had the greatest sense of gentleness Shelagh had ever known and it brought a light wave of peace over her for that moment.

Within only a few moments, Constable Noakes had broken through the lock and was on the inside of the flat with Patrick by his side. The sight of the two of them opened the flood gates and Shelagh collapsed in a ball of sobs – both in relief and in fear. Patrick was at her side in an instant. He wanted nothing more than to encapsulate her tiny frame with his arms and pepper her with kisses of comfort, but he immediately scolded himself for even having such thoughts about not only a married woman, but such a vulnerable one at that. He had no right to think such things about this woman, who was no more his than the stars in the sky.

"It's okay, we're here now. All will be okay," Patrick reassured her as he gently placed a hand on her shoulder at which she slightly winced. He immediately retracted his hand and asked, "Do you feel we are safe to stay here while I examine and treat you?"

"No, we need to get out of here as soon as we can," she said with utmost certainty through the steady stream of tears still flowing down her face. "I've packed a small bag, and I need to get out of here," and she looked up at Patrick as if begging, "Please."

"Of course," He shifted his focus now to the constable who was waiting near the door, "Constable, would you mind escorting us back to my car and then asking Fred if he'll come by and reaffix the hinges so the door is hung properly again?"

"Certainly, Doctor. Let's be on our way," Constable Noakes was happy to help as he had the same views on abusive husbands as Patrick.

Patrick was able to get Shelagh into Nonnatus and to Sister Julienne's office unseen by any of the other Nonnatuns. Sister Julienne covered her mouth and gasped when she first saw Shelagh. "Oh, my sweet girl," it was all she could manage to get out. However, she quickly regained her composure and stepped back into her role as nurse to assist Doctor Turner in assessing Shelagh's medical needs. She had no signs of any broken bones, but there was a lot of bruising and possibly a small fracture or two. Neither the doctor nor Sister Julienne were prepared for what they saw when they asked Shelagh to allow them to examine her abdomen and ribs. She was all shades of colours outside of the normal tones of skin. Shelagh's midsection was covered in bruises, new and old, fresh and healing. Patrick had to choke back tears that threatened to escape. He couldn't fathom how this woman had endured this much and kept so strong for so long. He went about his examination as carefully as he could and felt his heart crush a little more with each new piece of evidence of her nightmare of a marriage. He wanted nothing more than to be able to take it all away from her.

Shelagh laid there feeling humiliated and ashamed as Patrick and Sister Julienne conducted their examination of her midsection. She had confided in both of them in regards to her abuse, but she had never gone in to great detail of how bad it really was and now they were seeing first hand. All she could do was offer up silent prayers that she could find refuge and somehow get away from this situation. She wished so much that she'd be able to do that while staying in Poplar to continue her work and be with her friends, but she knew that she could never have both. John would never allow it. Much to her surprise, she realised that the most difficult thing about having to let it all go was the idea of having to leave behind Patrick and his amazing son. She knew that he was something quite amazing and had become such a wonderful friend to her, but she hadn't realised just how fond of him she really was until she laid there watching him to gingerly care for her in this battered state.

Her thoughts were interrupted by Sister Julienne's words, "Shelagh, we've finished the examination. Would you like to stay here tonight while you figure things out?"

Shelagh knew she'd have to leave Poplar, but she hadn't thought about where she'd stay for the night until she could completely get away. However, she knew Nonnatus House was the last place she could stay. "Sister, this would be the very first place he would look for me, but I don't know where else to go," she said with a bit of panic rising in her voice as well as a few tears beginning to creep into her eyes. Before either of the women could say anything, Patrick spoke up, "Stay with me," he had even surprised himself with his quickly blurted invitation. "I mean, at my house. Timothy is with his grandmother for a few days beginning tonight and no one would think to find you there," he clarified.

Sister Julienne piped up first saying that she thought it was a fine idea and Shelagh agreed. She wondered if this man could surprise her any further; his kindness obviously has no bounds and Shelagh found it incredibly endearing. She was so grateful to be at the receiving end of it all, but she vowed to herself to pay him back for all of this one day though she hadn't a clue how.

After Sister Julienne packaged up a bit of dinner for them to take along with them, Shelagh and Patrick made their silent escape from Nonnatus and drove off to Patrick's home, which, thankfully, was on the opposite side of town of the flat that Shelagh shared with John.

By the end of the night, Shelagh felt so much more relaxed than she had in such a long time. She had now cleaned herself of all blood and remnants of tears and was sitting on Patrick's couch with his pyjama shirt over her nightgown that she wasn't completely comfortable wearing in front of anyone, much less him. Thanks to her very tiny frame, the shirt was nearly to her knees. Patrick walked into the sitting room with a cup of warm milk, "Shelagh, won't you take my bed? It is far more comfortable than this couch."

Shelagh nearly had to laugh out of astonishment at the amount of chivalry this man had within him. "Certainly not, you've done enough. The couch will be just fine for me. Besides, you're must too tall to sleep comfortably here," she said this as she made a silly face while gesturing in regards to his height in comparison to hers. He chuckled which made her laugh as well. The sound of that laugh made her feel so comfortable and relaxed.

Patrick loved that Shelagh could still find her humorous side even after the hell she'd been through in the past twenty-four hours. He could listen to that infectious laugh forever. He was completely baffled by the way he was drawn to her more and more with each passing moment. He didn't want to leave her to go upstairs, but he knew they both needed their rest. Patrick reluctantly stood up from the couch where he had been sitting next to Shelagh and wished her a good night and reminded her that he was right down the corridor if she needed anything at all.

As they laid in their respective sleeping quarters for the night, they both lay there staring at the ceiling thinking. Shelagh thought of how grateful she was for Patrick's kindness and generosity. She wished so much that one day she could have the opportunity to have someone like Patrick in her life as more than a friend and/or colleague. She also dreaded the idea of having to leave him behind for good when she left Poplar. He was the model to which she would compare all men in the future, though she doubted any of them would ever truly compare to the original. With that she drifted off to a more peaceful sleep than she'd had since before she was married.

Patrick thought of the woman sleeping down the hall from him right now and all he could think about was how truly beautiful she was – inside and out. He wished so much that she wouldn't have to leave Poplar, but it was inevitable because there was no way he'd live with himself if she ever had to suffer through that kind of beating again. But, instead of thinking of that terrible truth, he just replayed the sound of her delightfully captivating laugh over and over again in his head like an oh-so-perfect lullaby until he drifted off into a sleep filled with the happiest dreams he'd had in years.


	3. Chapter 3

As usual, Shelagh awoke well before dawn, as she was so used to going to Nonnatus to join the sisters for morning prayer. She had to collect her thoughts and remember just where she was in the first few seconds of consciousness. The aches throughout her body quickly reminded her of the events of the last couple of days and the fear began to sink in again. She felt incredibly safe at Doctor Turner's house, but she knew that she would need to be on her way as soon as she could in order to avoid any further confrontation with her husband. Shelagh had yet to figure out just where she would go, but she thought she might just head north – possibly back to Scotland for a while. She doubted he would think to look that far, or at least hoped he wouldn't.

She decided it was time to get up and get moving for the day. She made her way to the lavatory to get dressed for the day. She attributed it to all of the mixed emotions she felt running rapid through her thanks to the fiercely terrifying events that had taken place within the past few days, but as she began to remove the pyjama shirt that Patrick had loaned her she hesitated. She began to take in his scent that was so deeply engrained into the fabric and it made her feel comforted and safe. She had encountered this scent dozens of times through working in close proximity to Patrick over the years, but it had never had this effect on her before. She took just a moment to indulge by inhaling deeply into the shirt before taking it off to get dressed into her clothes for the day. Once dressed, she decided to get a cup of tea and would then call the train station to get times of departing northbound trains. There was still no sign of Patrick, but it was far too early for any normal person to be awake.

Once she had taken down all of the information from the train depot, she decided to call Sister Julienne to discuss her plans.

"Good morning, Sister. It's Shelagh."

"Yes, Shelagh, good morning. Are you well this morning after some rest? I've been quite worried about you after seeing your condition yesterday."

"I rested quite well. I'm as sore and achy as can be expected, but ready to get away as fast as possible. I really need to get all of this put behind me and minimize the possibility of having to endure it again. I've called the train depot and there is a northbound train leaving late this afternoon. So, I'll just need to buy my time until about half past five."

"Northbound?" Sister Julienne knew Shelagh would probably try to get away from London, but she hadn't quite thought of where she might go. She had little family – if any.

"Yes, I thought I might head back up to Scotland. I'm sure I could find work in Edinburgh or Glasgow once I arrive. I hope I won't put Nonnatus in too much of a bind with my sudden departure, but I'm sure you understand." Shelagh's heart ached at the mention of leaving. She wanted so badly to stay in Poplar. Everything wonderful in her life was here, but this was one more thing that John seemed to be able to take away from her. She hoped one day she could return, but she was beginning to choke up at the idea of having to leave. Sister Julienne could sense this in Shelagh's voice.

"My dear, might I make another suggestion?"

"Of course, Sister"

"Would you consider just taking a holiday to the mother house as a guest? It is in Chichester. You don't have to decide now, but won't you ask Doctor Turner to bring you by Nonnatus so we can at least discuss it? I think you might also benefit from having a chat with constable Noakes about your situation – past and present – with John."

Shelagh certainly considered it, and wasn't entirely against the idea, as it wasn't one that had ever entered her mind before now. She also knew – deep down – that Sister Julienne was right about speaking with the constable, so she agreed to ask for a ride to Nonnatus before completely committing herself to the journey back to Scotland to begin anew. It was all so much that she had to consider and she hated the idea so much that she would even have to consider leaving all of this behind. Other than John, there was nothing she would change about her life here in Poplar. As if she'd just been hit with a ton of bricks in her emotional centre, she broke. All of the emotions that she'd been trying so hard to keep together over the past eight years had decided to escape her all at once. Just then, Patrick was coming down the stairs and saw what was happening. He made it to the bottom of the stairs just in time to catch her before she fell straight to the floor in a heap of sobs.

Patrick knew that this wee woman had been through much more than even he could imagine and wished more than anything that he could take it all away, but in that moment, he did all he could and held her upright as she allowed the emotions to escape her. She didn't pull away and he tried to maintain propriety as best he could, but he couldn't help but admit to himself that this felt tremendous – to be the one to hold her in her time of need. He knew he could never speak of such things in a time like this, but Shelagh had certainly become an object of his affection. Patrick wished more than anything that he could be the one to make all of these terrible pastimes disappear and be replaced with new, happy memories, but he knew that he was playing with fire in this delicate situation and he needed to get control of himself and his feelings. Despite it all, he knew that he would do whatever she needed of him and be there for her as the best friend she could possible ask for. He knew he had to have her in his life, no matter in what capacity.

Through the sudden flood of emotion and tears, it took Shelagh a few minutes to process what had happened when Patrick had caught her, but once she realised it, she had no intention of changing a thing. She allowed herself the emotional release that she so desperately needed and marvelled at how natural it felt to be encased in his arms. Just as his scent earlier, this made her feel comforted and safe. It was as if she could stay right here for a lifetime, and in that moment, she wished she could. She knew these thoughts were completely inappropriate at a time like this, but she simply couldn't help herself. As the emotions began to simmer down, she began to think that Patrick was probably feeling quite awkward standing there holding his sobbing colleague. She knew he was too much a gentleman to say anything about it, but she thought it best that she compose herself quickly so she could allow him to release her and the awkwardness that accompanied their current position. Just as she began to stand up on her own, he reached out and handed her a hankie. Their hands touched for the briefest of moments, but it was as if there was a shot of electricity that ran straight though every vein in Shelagh's body, unlike anything she'd ever felt before. It was so intense, it nearly made her jump. She couldn't quite put her finger on it, but there was certainly something there between them.

Once she had a dry face once again and had regained her composure, Shelagh explained her phone call to Sister Julienne and asked for a ride to Nonnatus to sort things out and decide which direction she would go from this point. Patrick listened intently, but the idea of her leaving was nearly soul-crushing. He hated the idea that she would have to give up all of the incredible things she had built here because of this scumbag she was married to. Not only was she one of the best midwives he'd ever had the pleasure of working with, but she was such an incredible person and member of the community. She was always the first to help someone in need and never expected anything in return. It was incredible that she was so involved in the lives of all of those around her, yet none of them knew the extent of her pain and suffering behind closed doors. He just couldn't let her go, but could he really ask her to stay when he knew what was at stake? He knew that if this was the result of her speaking with legal counsel, John would certainly kill her if he managed to get to her again. Despite his longing for her to stay in Poplar, he knew that her leaving was her only chance at any life worth living, and it truly broke his heart.

Patrick happily gave Shelagh a lift back to Nonnatus and escorted her to Sister Julienne's office for further discussion of their plan before heading off for his own daily rounds. Before entering the office though, Patrick stopped Shelagh. "Shelagh, I really hate to see you leave, but I really hope you can find the peace that you deserve. Just know that you'll be sorely missed by all of Poplar, including me." With that, he reached out and gave her hand a quick and friendly squeeze before turning to leave. Much to his surprise, Shelagh responded to his turned back, "I don't want to go, and I'll miss you, too." She had even surprised herself with her response and was almost embarrassed that those words had escaped her before she had a chance to mull them over, so she quickly entered Sister Julienne's office before he had an opportunity to say anything in return. Patrick stood dead in his tracks for just a moment trying to process what he had just heard before he continued on his way.

Shelagh and Sister Julienne had a very heartfelt conversation about Shelagh's concerns and longing to stay in Poplar, and they both decided it best that Shelagh visit the mother house in Chichester for a few weeks to collect her thoughts and find her way before making any drastic decision. They had also decided that Shelagh needed to have a talk with Constable Noakes about her situation and at least have it on file what happened. With that, Sister Julienne called the constable to come down to Nonnatus at his convenience to have a discussion with Shelagh, and upon Shelagh's request, Sister Julienne was to sit in on the conversation. Shelagh would stay at Nonnatus for the night because the first train to Chichester wasn't leaving until morning and she didn't want to inconvenience Patrick for a second night – or at least that was the excuse she gave Sister Julienne, deep down she knew it was embarrassment of her words earlier.

Constable Noakes arrived much sooner than either Shelagh or Sister Julienne had expected, but were happy to have him there and get this part of it all out of the way.

"My! What quick service, Constable. Might I get you some tea?" Sister Julienne greeted politely.

"I'm sorry, Sister, I'm not sure I know what you mean. I came searching for Nurse Greene. It seems as though her husband has come up missing," Constable Noakes replied a bit confused by the greeting he'd received.

Shelagh's eyes widened. What on earth could he be up to now? She was petrified of what her husband would have up his sleeve. She had no idea what to say or do at this point.


	4. Chapter 4

_**A/N: Sorry for the delay everyone! Thanks so much for your patience. I really struggled with this chapter. While I knew what direction I wanted to go with it, I had trouble getting it all to flow together. I welcome all reviews - both positive and constructive. Thank you for all of the support and reviews so far. It means the world to me. Enjoy!**_

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"Oh? We had just called the station to request you come down to take a statement. I did not tell the station, but it was for Nurse Greene. She wanted to make a formal record of the events that took place just the other night. I had assumed that was why you had come," Sister Julienne clarified.

"Unfortunately, Sister, I'm here to ask Nurse Greene to answer a few questions to help us with this investigation of his disappearance, but I'd be happy to take her statement once we're finished. May we use your office for this?"

"Yes, or course." Sister Julienne responded graciously.

As they walked the short distance to Sister Julienne's office, she noticed that Shelagh was looking nearly green. "Shelagh, dear, are you okay?" she asked softly.

Shelagh hesitated and swallowed in an attempt to steady herself before answering, "I'm just scared of what he might be up to. It is harder to feel safe when I don't even know where he is."

Sister Julienne nodded as she completely understood what Shelagh was saying, but knew there were not words that could truly comfort her at this time so she placed a gentle hand on her shoulder to show Shelagh that she was there and ushered her to sit down upon arriving in her office.

Constable Noakes began his questioning, but it was short lived as Shelagh had no information at all for him. He explained that he had left his shift at the docks at his normal time and was last seen at his regular pub, but no one seemed to remember where he said he was going or what time he left. He never showed up for his shift this morning and that's when the report was filed. There was no evidence that suggested he had ever made it home last night. Shelagh was truly baffled because she knew John would have wanted to go home, if for no other reason than to give her more hell, but she couldn't come up with a single idea of where he might have gone instead or why he wouldn't have gone to his shift. He may have been a drunkard, but he never missed a shift.

Once they had gone through the ins and outs of John Greene's disappearance, Shelagh was able to begin giving her formal statement about the abuse she had endured two nights prior. Constable Noakes took meticulous notes and documented each and every injury to put in the record once he arrived back at the station, and informed Shelagh that legal action would be taken against Mr. Carlisle for breach of confidentiality, and once John was found, they'd address the abuse. He also advised Shelagh to stay put and keep calm; he knew her fears and wanted her safe just as everyone else did, but he knew that panicking wouldn't solve anything and could only make things worse.

Shelagh – with a bit of help from Trixie – put a bit of makeup on to cover the worst of her bruises, but this time it was much more than could be hidden by a bit of pan stick, so she knew she would have to finally let her fellow Nonnatuns in on her dark secret. She figured it time since she'd be leaving and they'd all want to know why she was no longer with them. However, the small bit of it that she was able to cover made her feel at least a little better about facing all of her friends – or as she liked to think of them, family.

As expected, everyone was in shock at Shelagh's appearance when she arrived at the dining table; there were even a few immediate tears shed. Before anyone could get up – because most of them were about to – Shelagh began to speak so she could explain to everyone at once and get it all out while she still felt brave enough to do it. She started from the very beginning and spared no detail of her abuse and dark secrets she had been hiding all of this time. She wanted nothing more than to free herself from the burden of these secrets she'd been carrying for so long. She finished up her long-overdue confession to her closest friends by explaining the newest discovery of his disappearance and her plans to leave Poplar for good, but she just had to figure a few details out first. She didn't tell them that she'd be at the mother house because she wanted them to be able to honestly say they didn't know where she was if anyone asked.

Shelagh was met with so much sympathy and a multitude of loving embraces; she was nearly overwhelmed with emotion. It nearly crushed her at the idea of leaving all of this behind as she'd never felt so loved and wanted in all of her life. All she could think was how unfair it was that John was able to take all of this away from her.

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That evening as everyone was winding down in preparation for heading off to bed, Shelagh heard a knock at the front door of Nonnatus. She knew she was not to answer the door because she was meant to be in hiding, so she informed Sister Julienne. Shelagh stayed in a state of nervousness and anxiously wondered who it could be so late in the evening. Within a few moments, Sister Julienne returned with Patrick.

"Shelagh, Doctor Turner has come to inspect your wounds once more before you begin you journey tomorrow. I'll leave you two to it then," Sister Julienne explained before she dismissed herself.

"Oh, thank you for coming, but I really don't think it is necessary. I'm fine, really," She realised that she sounded like she was more trying to convince herself of that than him, but she also didn't want to be any further bother to him, despite the fact that she was so grateful for an opportunity to see him again before she left. She wasn't sure if she'd ever get an opportunity to again, which, of course, broke her heart to pieces.

"It's no trouble at all. I'm happy to check. I want to make sure you're fit for travel," Patrick jokingly replied with a bit of a wink. And with that, Shelagh allowed herself a quick and bashful smile. This was nearly Patrick's undoing. He knew that she didn't need to be assessed again, even in the slightest. She was surrounded by nurses and was a quite capable nurse herself, but he had to come up with an excuse to see her one last time. He so desperately wanted to take her in his arm and pledge for protect her until the end of time and beg her to stay and be his forever, but he knew that couldn't happen. First reason, she's technically a married woman – one with very high morals at that, and the second reason, could he really keep her from living in fear for the rest of her life being this close to such an abusive and possessive man – not likely.

Patrick continued to attempt to reason with himself as to why he couldn't ask her to stay as he gently checked over each wound and carefully inspected each bruise. He was quite surprised that she hadn't lost her patience with him, as he was moving painfully slow through this entire examination; however, only he knew that it was just so he could spend every possible moment with her before he absolutely had to let her go.

Despite the wee bits of pain that occurred with Patrick would graze a bruise the wrong way, she would give anything for this to never end. He looked at her in a most magical way that made her feel as if they were the only two humans in the entire world. She felt her breath hitch as he gently touched her cheek, and knew she need to practice self-restraint because all she wanted to do was lean into him and bury herself into his chest. She'd never felt like this before, but she was beginning to think she was falling for Patrick. Before she could mentally scold herself, Shelagh found herself staring straight into Patrick eyes with the utmost intensity. She literally felt it course through her entire body as his hand brushed her cheek and he locked in on her gaze. He must have felt it too because before she could process any of it, Patrick's lips were on hers. It was the most incredible feeling she'd ever experienced, but, her brain kicked in faster than she had hoped and she pulled away almost immediately and turned away from him. " _You're a married woman! What are you doing?!"_ She thought to herself.

Patrick had lost his self-control for the briefest of moments, and it was everything he had dreamed of for the millisecond that it lasted, but he was brought right back to his senses when she pulled away and turned her back to him. He felt so low, he knew what he had just done was wrong.

"I'm sorry. That was unforgivable" Patrick apologised.

"I'm not sure it is your place to decide if it is unforgivable or not, but please know that I'm turning my back not because of you, but because of my marriage vows. I think it best if you leave." It crushed Shelagh to say those words to Patrick, but she knew it was in both their best interests. Neither of them needed to be in a situation any more complicated than the one she was in right now, and she didn't want Patrick to be any further involved than he already was. She knew this was the only want to protect him from the wrath of John.

Patrick knew not to say anything else and to just walk away. However, there was a small part of him that was rejoicing at the idea that she wasn't telling him to leave because she didn't reciprocate his feelings, but because she was married to another man. That was all he needed to know – his glimmer of hope.

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Shelagh had said all of her goodbyes and had gotten a lift to the train station from Fred. She hadn't slept a wink the night before as all she could think about was the kiss from the night before. It was as if each time she ran her fingers over her lips she could feel his there again. She wished so much that she was in any other situation so that she could embrace the feelings she had for Patrick and the feelings that he so clearly had for her as well.

Patrick had also lied awake in his bed all night thinking more and more about the kiss he'd had with Shelagh. Despite the fact that it was not the right time or situation, he knew it was one of the most exhilarating moments he'd ever experienced. He wanted nothing more than to get to do kiss her again over and over. When the alarm went off, he was already wide awake, but he slowly made his way out of bed to start the first day of life without Shelagh around. The thought was heart wrenching, but he was so grateful that he'd always have their kiss to hold onto. He had his morning tea and made his way to Nonnatus House to pick up a bit of paperwork from Sister Julienne before he began his rounds.

As he sat in Sister Julienne's office, he couldn't help but think how empty this place felt without Shelagh here. Even though he didn't see her every time he came here, just the thought of her being gone was enough to make him feel the emptiness that followed her exodus. Just as Sister Julienne was about to begin going through the needed paperwork with Patrick, there was a knock at the office door. Trixie had escorted Constable Noakes from the front door.

"Sister, Doctor, I'm looking for Nurse Greene. Are you aware of her whereabouts? It's imperative that I speak with her straight away," Constable Noakes explained with an undeniable sense of urgency in his voice.

"I'm sorry Constable, but Nurse Greene is already headed to the train station with Fred to head out of the area. Is there something I might be able to help with?" Sister Julienne politely offered.

Patrick's curiosity was piqued and he was also quite concerned. Was Shelagh in some kind of danger? What could the constable need with her right now that would be so urgent? Had they found John? Or worse, had John found her? His mind was racing to every possible negative scenario – rational or not before the constable spoke again.

"Well, Sister, we've found John. Apparently, the evening he went missing he had consumed far more spirits than usual and tumbled right off the dock into the river on the way home. He was so inebriated that he couldn't swim. His body was found washed up on shore late last night and we've been putting all of the missing pieces together this morning. I wanted to let her know before she left, but I suppose I'll just send a letter so she'll receive it just after she arrives."

Patrick jumped up out of his seat grabbing his coat and keys. "No, I'll tell her in person. I'll catch her before the train leaves." And before anyone could say another word, he was gone, leaving both Constable Noakes and Sister Julienne with a look of utter shock plastered to their faces.

As Patrick was racing down the front steps of Nonnatus, he saw Timothy walking up to his car. "Tim, what are you doing here?"

"Granny Parker dropped me off because I knew you'd be here this morning. I'd thought I'd join you on your rounds this morning."

"I'm not going on my rounds," Patrick said with a tone of true certainty, but he figured Timothy might as well join, as this was about to affect his life too.

As they drove to the train station, Patrick explained as much as was appropriate to Timothy about the situation and why he was going to seek Shelagh. Timothy was ecstatic about the idea and told his father how fond of Shelagh he was too and how much he hoped that she'd still be at the station when they arrived. That was all Patrick needed to hear. He knew that he needed to get to the woman he loved and that had also captured the heart of his son. The night before may have been bad timing, but this wouldn't be.


End file.
